Why No One Wants to Talk About Kids Who See Ghosts

Today, I am happy to be the first stop on the blog tour for Dr. Goode’s newest book, Kids Who See Ghosts, guide them through their fears, available June 8, 2010.

Listen to us talking about the launch and the book in this short conversation:

Shelagh Jones interviews Dr Caron Goode

“Kids Who See Ghosts takes an up-close and personal look at ghosts, kids who see them, and the parents who want to help. The purpose of this book is to bridge the gap between the mainstream minds and the psychic minds, providing answers and guidance….” – From the Preface

When children see ghosts, what’s a parent to do? Moms and dads ask themselves, “Does my child possess unique gifts, or is my kid possessed? Will this be a one-time, ‘weird’ event, or is my child destined to be haunted for life? Does my child need psychological help or some kind of meds? Should I believe what my child reports even if I don’t believe in ghosts?”

When kids report ghost sightings, parent’s reactions may range from feeling paralyzed with fear to being curious and supportive. If their children are scared by encounters with the spirit world, parents naturally fret about how to best help their kids through this fear. And this can be a challenge because in some cases fear can be so intense that it causes the child – and sometimes the parent, too – to become physically sick. On the other hand, what if children feel open and comfortably connected to the world of ghosts, parents may feel less worried – or even more alarmed. Either way, parents are sure to be perplexed about how to proceed.

Seeing ghosts can be an opportunity for both children and parents to move through fear, explore different realities, and learn about the world of spirits. However, in this month’s column, we open the door to a topic that has been swept under a proverbial rug and not discussed openly.

The Hushed Topic

In some households, kids are told, “Hush. Don’t talk about that. Don’t tell any one. You’re crazy. You’re lying.” In other families, parents are fascinated with the subject. Yet very few professionals who work with children want to talk about ghosts and people who see them.

However, concerned and caring parents do want to talk about it because their kids see spirits, ghosts, fairies, and light orbs. Thirteen-year-olds who see shadows at night and at school during the day need someone to talk with and listen to them. Teens who have seen ghosts all of their lives have to sort through their realities and determine whether or not to speak openly. Parents of younger children, who won’t sleep in their rooms because a resident ghost visits them, ask me how they can help their children.

How they help depends on the parent’s viewpoints. Are the parents as scared of the spirits as their children are? Or are they thrilled with their child’s ability and want to know how to encourage the talent? Or do they feel at a loss with a crying toddler?

Why Aren’t We Talking About It?

Not talking about the topic only adds an element of mystery and increases fear about the subject. One reason for not talking about ghosts is the lack of understanding of how people see. What a person sees takes place within the brain’s chemistry by virtue of how our eyes work. Our eyes see light only, and our brains then interpret the images based upon our memory banks. This is an ongoing process in which memories are updated as our brains adapt to our environments, learn new skills and have new life experiences. So are all ghosts figments of one’s own brain chemistry? Or are they real? It depends upon our cultures and how we adapt our worldviews.

A second reason we don’t talk about ghosts is based upon cultural norms. One Native American child who speaks with his grandmother in her spirit body is very different from a child raised to believe that dead bodies go into the ground and that the person-to-person connection is over. Did your culture and upbringing provide a place for spirits and afterlife, or was death “spooky” and not talked about?

A third reason to remain silent is simply the fear of being accused of being crazy. Those who have experiences outside of the norm may find little support in mainstream teachings to validate their reality.

Yet, Watch The Trend Grow!?

Ghosts and other such unknowns live within a metaphorical Pandora’s box. This column opens that box to clear the air and breathe some new life into the topic. More kids are seeing ghosts, and I expect the trend to grow. Why?

Ghosts are a hot topic, as evidenced by the average ten million viewers of the television show “Ghost Whisperer.” Current media interest on this topic of ghosts will continue and expand because the public is fascinated by what we once called the “paranormal.” I am thinking the term “normal” is now more appropriate because more television shows on paranormal topics are airing and books on topics like vampires and fairies of this fantasy genre grow in popularity.

Also, according to a 2007 pre-Halloween poll conducted by the Associated Press, 34% of people polled said they believed in ghosts, and those who believed included people of all religions and socioeconomic levels. That percentage is going up. The Harris Poll conducted a survey during the week of November 2, 2009 to find that 42% percent of Americans believe in ghosts.

Ghosts can be children’s best friends, and facing a fear of ghosts is a way for parents and kids to become empowered. Life is to be enjoyed and for finding passionate purpose. If ghosts are part of that experience, then together let’s explore why and how.

I hope you will feel inspired by the book summary. If you do, be sure to sign up for the book launch reminder so you can buy Kids Who See Ghosts and receive free personal development gifts on June 8, 2010. To register, go to: http://www.kidswhoseeghosts.com (if you are reading this article after that date, you may buy the book directly from that page).

Also, follow the Kids Who See Ghosts blog tour. Go to Day 2 at http://www.margodill.com/blog/ and read about more great books for parents and kids.

My favourite April Fools Day pranks

I adore April Fools Day!

Right from the very first BBC television spoof “Spaghetti Harvest” showing peasants collecting basketsful of spaghetti strands found hanging on trees,
through my absolute favourite Guardian guide to the island of San Seriffe to my favourite of today -Hootsuite takes Social Media into 3D.

Among others I’ve liked today are:

GMTV report that Blackpool Zoo have been accused of “Heightism” for advertising for a new Giraffe Keeper who must be at least 6′ 2″ tall so he can reach to feed the giraffes

Telegraph reports that ferrets are being used to deliver Broadband services in rural areas (via Virgin).

Bolton bakery Sayers has produced the first left-handed sandwich

And from Google – Translate for Animals – Bridging the gap between animals and humans.

If you’ve a favourite, do tell us!

How do you read your books?

I read this in Jane Duncan Rogers’s newsletter, and liked it so much I wanted to share! (Remember – I’m the one who had to get rid of a load of books because my husband said my bookshelves were bringing the ceiling down….!)

How do you read your books?

You will already probably know the importance of reading books as part of your personal and business development journey.

Many of the business ‘gurus’ tell us we should be reading one book a week at least if we want to be successful.

This is either daunting or exciting depending on where you are coming from, or whether you have learnt speed reading or not. But how do you actually read your books, and how might this process in itself affect your success?

Here’s my top ten pointers to successful learning from books, discovered over the years:

1. Have more than one on the go, on different topics, so you can pick up whichever one matches your mood at the time.

2. Write in them! Yes – have a marker pen handy always, so you can underline, make comments, and even longer notes in the back. These will be very useful when you come back to re-reading them. (If you come from the school of thought which says never mark a book, then try using a pencil instead, or be radical and do it anyway!)

3. Never read a business book last thing at night. At best, you won’t remember in the morning what you’ve read, and at worse, it will keep you awake! Always have a selection by your bed if that is where you read; but choose a novel to read just before you go off to sleep (this is also the one you read when you are having time off from work.)

4. You don’t have to finish a book. Who said you had to? The pleasure in reading is the journey, as you’ve probably noticed when you are reading a great story and you don’t want it to finish. Similarly, you don’t have to begin at the beginning – you can dip in and out; read the end first; move backwards and forwards through the book. You can read it in anyway you like.

5. You don’t have to remember everything you read – what you need to know in the moment will stay, and you will be inspired to look at that book again when you need more information from it.

6. Re-read your highlights after you have finished your book. Or share them with your partner or a friend. This way you are benefitting from repetition, which is the most powerful way to learn.

7. Pay attention when you find a book coming your way from 2 or 3 different sources; it probably means it is meant for you!

8. Come to each book you read with the certain knowledge that you will find in this book exactly what you want at that particular moment in your life.

9. If you write articles, keep a notebook handy or a computer file for useful quote from the books you are reading. Organise this so it’s easy to find them.

10. Re-reading a few brilliant books over and over is likely to be more effective than continually reading one after another thinking you have to get to the end and then you’ll know the gem you’ve been looking for. Trust me – I’ve done it and have the library to show for it!

Jane Duncan Rogers runs RichThinkers, inviting small businesses and self-employed professionals to align their thoughts, feelings and actions with the heart and soul of their business for greater success and more meaningful results. Visit http://www.richthinkers.co.uk and sign up for her free weekly newsletter, Spirit of RichThinking.